BLOGGER, PLEASE

Since I don’t post frequently enough to have any readers, I may as well explain the reference.  Bill Maher has a segment on Real Time (well, at least he did during the writer’s strike) of the same title.  I thought it might be a good segue into observing the rather awkward fact that I’ve effectively become my own guest blogger.  Of course, it is also a run on a certain phrase, but that’s the whole point to wordplay, now isn’t it?

X-MASSED

Christmas is over.  Again.  In past, I’ve written long-winded diatribes on everything from the historical origins of the holiday to parodies of certain holiday literature (“The Night Before Christmas” was always an easy favourite) or some mix thereof and emailed them to friends.  I simply didn’t have it in me to put on the clever pants this year.  Let’s call it equal parts consumer fatigue and some sort of post-modern crescendo.

There might be something wrong with your celebration when it’s not worth prodding with a critical eye or lampooning anymore.  There’s something rather telling about that, I think.

One final missive.  Canadian Tire began its television advertising campaign this year before the end of the American Thanksgiving.  While they might think they’re getting the drop on their competition, that’s basically like telling me to consider you a corporate non-person for the whole year.  Follow the rules, kids.

OBSERVED

Something in the collective unconscious irked me into watching every Kevin Smith movie, including all three “evening” question and answer sessions that run slightly in excess of ten hours.  I’m not looking to join the adoring fan cult, but I have two observations.  First, Clerks has aged exceptionally well (I’m looking at you Wal-Mart).  Second, more filmmakers should do this sort of question and answer thing.  There are quite of few out there that have a great deal more to answer for.  Keep them coming, Kevin.

SHELVED

I just finished Joseph Boyden’s latest novel (and Giller 2008 winner), Through Black Spruce.  I have not had a chance to read any fiction since starting back in school in September — well, provided we discount all of that theory I was made to read this last term which surely occupies a tangent “fictive” reality.  I have not read any of the other nominees, but there is something about that book that lingers.  I’m trying to get my hands on a hardcover copy of Three Day Road which appears to have vanished upon the arrival of the post-Giller paperbacks, alas.

I’ve decided to keep a novel going throughout next term (despite the heinous amount of reading required of me).  I thought another recently gifted book, Thomas King’s Green Grass, Running Water — a novel I should have read during undergrad but somehow missed — would be an appropriate chaser.

ACCELERATING RETURNS

I’ve been using the same superb MacBook Pro since I defected to the Apple-verse two and a half years ago.  While it has surely been the gift that keeps on giving, I’ve decided to pick up another sooner than later.  I’m thinking I might go desktop this time since my laptop still has a year warranty and I wouldn’t mind having everything locked down in a single, secure place that does not require constant plugging and unplugging.  Macworld is only a handful of days away, so we’ll have to see what they come up with this year.  No significant rumours yet, but it is likely they’ll “chip” their existing line.

Plus, I can always pick up a new (and significantly lighter) laptop next year — if there’s a next year (I’m looking at you looming economic depression).

THIS WEEK

I am attempting to reset my internal clock after accidentally becoming nocturnal.  I decided to get marking done early at all cost.  While I succeeded, I just can’t sleep — well, when I’m “supposed” to anyway.  Apart from that, I have a book review to finish and some course readings to get out of the way before a rather large research paper.  So, basically, it’s back to work.  Perhaps I shall editorialize here later and dilute this rare personal aside.